This post is about my mother. It’s also about all other mothers out there in the past, present, and future.
First of all, the picture above was taken when I was about sixteen years old. It was a crazy time in my life. I was too old for some things but not old enough for most adult things. It was a very frustrating period for me. My sister, who is four years younger is to the far left. My mother is on the far right side of the picture.
My mom was married to my step-father at the time. He adopted me and I took the last name of West around 1984-1985. I liked getting that name. My first last name was Snow. I liked West better. I thought it sounded more Western or rugged, although I didn’t like watching Western movies as a kid, I most definitely love them now.
My stepdad had never had kids. My sister and I never had a stepdad. My sister didn’t seem to have an issue with my stepfather but I did a lot of times. Sometimes he could be a little harsh. He was, and still is an outdoorsman. I remember on occasions he would attempt to take me hunting. My feet would freeze. I was so cold. My hands would freeze as we marched through the woods like soldiers. All I wanted to do was go home and be warm. I hated it. He hated I hated it.
Today, I don’t get to do much hunting because I’m so busy doing other things. I love the outdoors though and love guns now as a grown man. If my limbs freeze while being in the woods or near the water it makes me feel more alive. It’s primal.
I have always thought my mom got pregnant with me when she was sixteen and gave birth to me when she was seventeen but I found out it was earlier than that. She brought me into this world when she was just sixteen years old. She was a baby that had a baby.
I don’t write this to shame her at all. It is what it is and it happened. It still happens today to many young girls. She just got pregnant young.
My earliest memories of my mom is sleeping with her in the bed. She always made me feel safe and loved. She still does today by bringing me soap from Bath and Bodywork’s. She also tries to give me old food sometimes, I think because she can’t stand to throw it away. I think it’s sweet and funny.
While I was growing up I remember my mother consuming romance books. She worked at the local Walmart and would bring a new book home almost everyday it seemed. She would read and read. She smoked while she read and would sip Coke from a bottle as she would turn each page. I think she lived on cigarettes and soda.
I never picked up a romance book and read it but I would ask her what her books were about. She’d just say they about romance.
My mother would teach me many things. She was, and still is a very independent woman. She taught me to be an independent man. To be strong, loyal, loving, and nurture being sensitive. She would teach me not to lie. She also said she hated liars. I didn’t want my mother to hate me so I dared not lie to her.
She seemed so much older to me. So much wiser. There was a great gulf in my mind between her and I in regard to age and wisdom. Now that I’m grown and lived many years I see she was just a kid with a kid. Read my story about Navigating Parenthood.
I watched my mom work very hard to provide for us. She would by milk for us and never drink it so we would have milk for cereal all week.
Today I’m very proud of my mother. She is in her retirement years and has worked as a hospice nurse for many years. I don’t know how she does what she does but I’m glad there are people who do that job. She brings comfort and care to dying people everyday.
I live in the same city as my mother and when I get a chance I like to visit with her. I don’t get to see her every day but it’s nice ti live close. When I was much younger and lived away, I didn’t value the closeness as much but today it’s important. It’s amazing how life and time changes personal values. Ages and stages we journey through this life.
Maybe you have a mother. If not, maybe you have mother figures in your life. You know who they might be. You might want to be a mother yourself. If you can’t, you can always be a mother figure to someone. You can shape a younger mind to be the best they can be.
Here’s some reasons why mothers are important.
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Thanks for sharing your thoughts!